I can always tell....

when the full moon approaches. people get fucking weird. weird things happen, on the road, at work, in general.

but alas, my temporary roomie is finally leaving. it is weird because the place is a little empty, but i'm ok with that. now i have to get more crap from my parents house and go through it and start getting rid of shit. you know, you don't realize how much SHIT you really have until you move. granted i'm one person. i can't imagine what you families have accumulated. i am so for simplicity. god i just have too much materialistic shit.....

i actually can't wait to start classes again. i feel something is missing when i'm not going to class. or doing homework. i have very little in the self-discipline department so when i have "free time" i just don't know what the fuck to do. the past week i actually have been relaxing, enjoying the beach and my house. but now i need to do some photos and get some shit done with that. i need to get some ready for submission. i NEED to get into the photo world, professionally that is.

and when i am home i am catching up on my Dr. Phil. yes i love him. he tells people basically what they should already know, but they apparently need it thrown in their face.

i had helped my sister move some more of her shit out of her old place. and man did she find some OLD photos! i took a couple. i will try to scan them and post. they are quite hysterical. you get to see my 80s hair do! actually the photos are from the 90s but ya know it was so hard to let go of the 80s! these two are of me and my best friend's brother. we were going out before her and i became best friends. to make a loooong story short, her family had to tell me that he married someone else (he was stationed elsewhere, stopped talkin to me, blah blah yadda yadda). he actually did me a huge favor. but ever since he hadn't ever seen me, even though i am best freinds with his sister and family. so whenever i'd go visit, he would either cancel his plans or just not go. what a pussy. hey it's been years i don't give a rat's ass anymore. but there was no way to avoid me the last time i visited. i got to meet his "wife". and his family had told me she looked like me. well she almost did. she is just BIGGER. which i found amusing. she's really nice, but a total dutz. quite a few bricks short of a load. anyway, i was just glad i looked good hahaha! anyway i am so digressing. i have another photo of my with Goofy at Disney. God what was I wearing. One of me with Vicki Lawrence, i got her autograph. and the prized photo........one of a guy i hung out with while my boyfriend was deployed. he is such a cutie but i was such a good girl then. i didn't cheat on my boyfriend, but now realize i probably should have. this guy is one that got away. i don't know if he liked me or not, but we hung out like good friends, almost brother and sister, but i had a crush. i think he liked my sister. what else is new. and then we lost contact. man if i could find his F-I-N-E ass again.......i used to have his social security number but no longer (he's a Marine and i got it from his dogtag haha). so i wouldn't be able to find him. makes me a bit sad. i wonder how he is, did he marry, have kids, all that stuff. i wonder what would have happened if we DID end up hooking up. at the time i just couldn't. i was too loyal. then of course i go through all my old photos of my favorite men. well not that i had many. i don't have any of P. i wish i did. but it might be best i don't have any. it pains me to think about him.....

don't you ever wonder what happened to the ones you loved once??

i could email one.....

i occasionally peruse the obits to see if another shows up, and i hold my breath because i hope i don't see it.....

i can't find the other one....

is this what happens when i get older???

*sigh*