I'm really sick and tired

of getting shitty service, and the negativity that surrounds people.

I had to go to the "clinic" today, which is free but you are subjected to a barrage of questions on how you are living when the numbers don't add up (on paper it appears I cann't make my rent each month). Which I wouldn't be able to without the student loans. But I don't declare those because, as with the food stamps I'm afraid I'll be denied service. I guess I'm lying but fuck, I pay taxes every fucking year for all this shit and I expect to use it.

But the people there just have issues. Or maybe I do. But I at least expect someone who is calling my name, to show up in the lobby, not playing hide and fucking seek with me. Open up the fucking door to the lobby I felt like telling the bitch. No hellos. Just "stand up there" "do this" do that. I apparently am asking way too much of the medical assistants to actually be human.

Then the doctor or practitioner comes in and is like 'o I see you haven't been in since September (counts, on her fingers, how many months that is), did you have enough medication?' No bitch I let my medication lapse for three months. OF COURSE I HAD ENOUGH. Then she rolls her eyes as if to judge me that I needed to keep my 3 month appointment. Um, hello. I'm a fucking adult. I've had this disease since I was 16 and know the fucking routine. My labs are WNL and with previous doctors I went in every 6 months not 3. I just can't stand when people treat me as if I'm some irresponsible adult that waltzes through that clinic because I am so not. I worked in health care and I know there are a lot (people who wait until they run OUT of medicine and then want it filled YESTERDAY), but I am not one of those people and I can't stand being blanketed in like that. I felt like telling the whole lot to go fuck themselves, or rather each other and maybe they'd lead happier lives, but I refrained. I hope I won't have to see them again now that I have insurance.

But I so want to write a letter to the clinic head. I've got two of the three names of the people. Granted, they may volunteer, but I can't stand people who have such disregard for dealing with people. Are health care professionals supposed to fucking CARE about the people they are supposedly helping? My damn tax dollars pay for that clinic. If they so can't stand that job they really need to get out of it.

Also, my (one of limited) friends here, called me up bitching that she is working too much. Granted she is a fill in for our company, but she has no idea what work is. "She wants time off, a vacation." Um, hello, do you have the MONEY for a vacation? What? You can't even pay your phone bill? And you want to work LESS? She still is waiting for her 'dream job' to fall into her lap (because she certainly isn't going out looking for it "she works too much"). She's tired of working 6 or 7 days a week without a break.

Because I'm her friend and I got her the job, she complains to ME every time. So finally I just told her listen, if you don't want to work, then tell the boss. You are a fill in, so then just tell her you can't do it (the boss scheduled her for days this month without talking to her, she does that). Quit your bitching and stand up for yourself. (She said she did, well she's still working). I'm just so tired of all the bitching about how no one does things HER way, that all the moms are stupid, can't make up their minds, she wants to get in and out of the hospital without any problems. Yea ok, you go back to your fantasy world girl cause you ain't gonna be able to work with anyone in this world.

Then my sister.......I can't imagine what she's up to now that her daughter is on spring break with her father. I haven't spoken much with her because I'm afraid to ask. Sounds horrible doesnt it? But there again is a lot of complaining and negativity. I'm trying to get out of that. I am trying to turn around my own negativity to something positive and it's hard enough without having to get it from outsiders.

I'm going to bed now.